the last 2 days of 2011

This year is so called my lucky year. I got the job I want. This really make me feel extremely happy XD But I know there is nothing pefect. Why do I feel this way? It happened 2 or 3 times. The plans didn't go well. Maybe everyone has its own priority. I usually take friends as my priority. Maybe I need to change. I should take myself as my own priority. Sometimes you care them so much. It turns out they don't treat u equally. It's so called friends? I don't know~ I should treat myself better. In this way, I can make my life better.

being alone

being alone seems sad
this is the first step to live a new life
no friend
only myself
last year when I felt alone, I used to went to the place friends live in.
This year should be different
I can't always count on others
I should find something interesting by myself
and I should take this year as a preparing year, like the year that I study abroad
everyone would change
even best friends
I should have known that
so don't complain, don't whine
they have their own life, so do I
sometimes they would be cruel~

I've tried

I try to forget, but it doesn't work
May I just leave some spaces in mind?
Let me just feel the pain
Let me just feel this stupid thought
It's hard
It never begin actually
I know it just happen in my mind, that's all
no one knows
only I know
May I just turn the suffer into power?
I hope so
L is for the way I look at you
O is for the only thing I own
V is a victory?
E is an expenrince I suffer from~
Time will heal~
How stupid I am! move on silly~

我怎麼了?

我到底是怎麼了?
明明工作已經找到了，卻是開心不起來，
工作沒頭緒，生活沒依靠，沒有人要跟我一起，
難道自己一個人不好嗎?
我覺得我現在好像沒朋友，自己一個人在空曠的公寓裡，
我根本也不知道出去要去哪裡?
去外面活動，看到每個人都是一起的，
自己更顯得孤單吧!
想要減肥，壓力一大又一直吃
明明說好的事，又不實行了
到底是怎麼了?
好想要哭~
想跟不認識的人，抒發自己的情緒，因為他們跟你不熟，也不會評論你，
多輕鬆阿~

stupid

Why am I so stupid?
Although I know there's nothing between us, I still hope a little.
few days ago, I knew the news. I didn't feel surprised. I just feel kind of sad.
I still pretend that I am fine.
I don't know you very much.
So it's just a crush?
I don't know
I don't know
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past,I just can't seem to move on><
Maybe time will heal eveything
it just takes time

find a way back into love

"New start"

It's been a year since I wrote the last article in the blog.
I use the same title again, but I forgot why I uesd the title last time.
Maybe it was the time I graduated(I guess XD)

This time, it's for real. I have a new job and I need to move to another city.
Maybe for some people, it's commom. But for me, it's a challenge. :D
Thank God trusting me, and let me pursue what I want.

But as I say, I'm a strange person.
My awkward, strange and confused personality sometimes drives me crazy >"<
This is reaaly what I want??
I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
I need a mentor to guide me.
Dear God, could you let me meet my mentor?